The Difference Between Love and Attachment

Updated: Jan 19, 2021

There is a difference between 'loving' someone and 'seeing/knowing' someone.

You could apply this to any relationship.

We all 'love', or feel as if we 'love' someone....but so often our definition of love is relative and how I love someone is more about me and my expression vs. the other person.

To SEE or KNOW someone is something quite out of this world.

To SEE / KNOW someone is to see their uniqueness, to see their gifts, and to encourage them to be themselves even when we do not understand it AND especially when it could affect the attachment that we are possibly mistaking as love.

To SEE / KNOW someone is to allow themselves FREEDOM to BE themselves.

It also means to see someone's shadows and projections and knowing that when they surface that it has nothing to do with you. There is very little triggering and projection when we are in this space with someone. When we KNOW/SEE someone it is FIRST because we know and see ourselves. Communication is open, transparent and each person is able to share from their own experience and how they FEEL vs. projecting their wounds and insecurities onto the other.

I've been on my own inner journey for some time now and I have to say that this is the most important element within my journey. As I have learned to move from a place of seeking validation outside of myself, settling for people in my life that do not see the best in me, and attaching the behavior of others to my own self worth to embodying myself, feeling ME, SEEING all of me and allowing space and integrating all of the aspects of myself that have been disembodied due to trauma, this shift has allowed me to come home to myself in a way I have never experienced before.

To FEEL myself, to embody HER and to then take action from that purity within is what it means to allow our masculine and feminine within to come alive!

This is how I am able to SEE others now in the way that I do....within my coaching, parenting, and every other relationship I enter into....and the people in my life feel safer with me because I know how to take care of me.

This is the greatest gift we can give ourselves and another.

How would your relationships shift if you could move from a place of 'loving' or 'attachment' to truly 'seeing' / 'knowing' someone?

Here is something to ponder....LOVE IS SEEING/KNOWING SOMEONE.....everything else is attachment.

You will know the difference by asking yourself 'how much freedom do I give others to be themselves without taking anything they say or do personally?'

The next time you catch yourself saying "I love you" to someone....ask yourself how you are defining what that means for you?

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